Friday, December 16, 2011

Bizarre Accidents

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Here are just a few of those strange accidents in history. We see these accidents on the news and all over the internet, but some of the strangest accidents that have ever happened can be found in history books.

Sidoarjo Mud Flow


In May, 2006, while drilling for gas in East Java, Indonesia, company PT Lapindo Brantas caused a mud volcano to erupt. By September, 2006, the hot mudflow had inundated rice paddies and villages, resulting in the displacement of more than 11,000 people from eight villages. Twenty-five factories had to be abandoned, and fish and shrimp ponds were destroyed. Transportation and power transmission infrastructure has been damaged extensively in the area. The mud flow is still ongoing at a rate of 100,000 m3 per day, at time of writing. A study has found that the mud volcano is collapsing under its own weight, possibly beginning caldera formation. It is expected that the flow will continue for at least another 30 years.

Boston Molasses Disaster


On January 15, 1919, a tank of molasses exploded in Boston’s North End. The explosion caused a huge shockwave that was sufficient to knock houses off their foundations. Shards of metal from the tank were found up to 200 ft. away. Right after the explosion this accident took a very strange turn.

The tank was filled with 2.3 million gallons of molasses. When the tank exploded, the molasses formed a 25-30 ft. wave, that went through the streets of Boston at speeds of around 35 mph. People caught in the wave were either smashed against large objects, or they drowned in the molasses. This strange accident caused 21 deaths and 150 injuries. Rumor has it that, on a hot day in the North End, the air still smells sweet.

The Ball of Burning Men


On January 28, 1393, King Charles VI of France hosted a ball to celebrate the marriage of Queen Isabeau’s maid of honor. Charles had the brilliant idea to have himself and five of his friends disguise themselves as savages. The idea took a strange turn when the men decided to cover themselves with pitch and feathers. Remember, pitch is very flammable and the primary sources of light indoors at the time were torches.

The men entered the ball disguised this way and chained together. A horrible accident occurred when a man approached them with a torch so that he could get a better look. The men went up in flames immediately. The king was saved by Jeanne de Boulogne, who threw her petticoats over him to put out the blaze. One other of the men was able to throw himself into a vat of water. The other victims of this strange accident were not so lucky. Two burned alive that night at the ball. The other two died within days from their injuries.

London Beer Flood


On October 16, 1814, a vat of beer at London’s Meux and Company Brewery cracked open. Beer gushed out, causing yet another vat to open. The result was 550,000 gallons (or 4.4 million pints) of beer pouring through the streets of London. The wave of beer destroyed two homes and crumbled the wall of the Tavistock Arms Pub, trapping teenaged employee Eleanor Cooper under the rubble. The brewery was located among the poor houses and tenements of the St Giles Rookery, where whole families lived in basement rooms that quickly filled with beer. Eight people drowned in the flood. The disaster was ruled to be an act of God.

Goiânia Accident


The Goiânia accident was a radioactive contamination accident that occurred on 13 September, 1987, at Goiânia, Brazil. Considered one of the worst nuclear disasters in history, it took place after an old nuclear medicine source was scavenged from an abandoned hospital site in the city, which serves as capital of the central Brazilian state of Goiás. It was subsequently handled by many people, resulting in four deaths and the serious radioactive contamination of 249 other people.

The dispersal of radiation was equivalent to a medium-size dirty bomb. About 130,000 people overwhelmed hospitals. Of those, 250 people, some with radioactive residue still on their skin, were found to be contaminated through the use of Geiger counters. Topsoil had to be removed from several sites, and several houses were demolished. All the objects from within those houses were removed and examined. Those that were found to be free of radioactivity were wrapped in plastic bags, while those that were contaminated were either decontaminated or disposed of as waste.

Lake Peigneur Accident


The Lake Peigneur accident was caused by drilling in a salt mine beneath the shallow (10 feet deep) lake. The drill accidentally pierced the third level of the mine causing the lake to drain into the hole. This resulted in the expanding of the hole as soil and salt were washed into the mine by the rushing water, filling the enormous caverns left by the removal of salt over the years. The resultant whirlpool sucked in the drilling platform, eleven barges, many trees and 65 acres (260,000 m2) of the surrounding terrain.

So much water drained into the caverns that the flow of the Delcambre Canal that usually empties the lake into Vermilion Bay was reversed, making the canal a temporary inlet. This backflow created, for a few days, the tallest waterfall ever in the state of Louisiana, at 164 feet (50 m), as the lake refilled with salt water from the Delcambre Canal and Vermilion Bay. The water downflowing into the mine caverns displaced air which erupted as compressed air and then later as 400-foot (120 m) geysers up through the mineshafts.

Napoleon’s Cough


Rumor has it that while Napoleon was suffering from a bad cough he accidentally ordered the execution of 1,200 prisoners. His officers had been awaiting orders from the emperor when he was seized by a coughing fit. The emperor exclaimed “Ma sacre toux,” meaning “My damn cough,” (or literally “My sacred cough,” but I think we know what he meant). His men took his words to be “Massacre-tous,” meaning “Massacre all.” This strange accident would top the list if it were proven. However, accounts of the incident vary greatly and many doubt whether this ever happened.

Death of Lady Coventry


Lady Coventry, or Maria Gunning, was a celebrated beauty of her time. She devoted herself to applying pasty white makeup and red rouge every day. This was the style of the time. Her husband hated this practice and tried to stop her from doing it, but her vanity prevailed. She probably should have listened to him. Lady Coventry died at the age of 27 from over use of lead-based makeup.

Bouncy Castle Disaster


In July, 2006, a bouncy castle, with 30 people inside it, broke free from its moorings and took off into the air in a freak gust of wind. It flew 50 feet into the air, turned over, and travelled 150 feet before landing on the ground. The castle seriously injured 13 people and killed two. An eye-witness described the event thus: “I heard the snapping of tent pegs and a lot of screaming, then the inflatable flew up into the air and bodies were dropping from it. It was just carnage. There were people everywhere lying on the ground. Some had been on the inflatable when it took off, others were hit on the ground.”

Philadelphia Boiler Explosion


On 31 July, 1815, in Philadelphia, County Durham, England, an early experimental railway locomotive, Brunton’s Mechanical Traveller, blew up. This engine, also known as the Steam Horse, ran on four wheels but was pushed by mechanical feet. This was both the first recorded boiler explosion and the first railway accident causing major loss of life, as 16 people were killed. The accident is not included in many texts because it was on an industrial waggonway or plateway, rather than a public railway. Most boiler explosions caused severe mechanical damage but often only the locomotive crew suffered physically; however, Brunton’s locomotive was surrounded, at the time, by a crowd of curious sightseers, who formed the majority of the victims.

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Pretty Good Indication Dating Websites

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Take 1,000 pictures of yourself, choose two or three that stand out, write up a blurb on how awesome you are and you have at it!

Daily Diapers


No, this isn’t a site for the aged and infirm wearing Depends. It’s the internet’s premiere FREE community for Adult Babies, Diaper Lovers, Big Kids, and fetishists galore who relish returning to a more peaceful time in their life: childhood. Apparently, these adult children grew up wearing plastic pants and “sissy clothes” as well. According to the site: “Adult Babies like to wear diapers, but also enjoy other babyish things. They may wear baby or sissy clothes such as Onesie-like snap-crotch T-shirts, rompers or play suits. They tend to like more colorful diaper covers and even frilly ruffled panty-style covers. Adult Babies may also enjoy drinking formula from baby bottles, or eating baby food. Generally they like to be treated totally like a baby during this play time, being changed, bathed, and even spanked by their partner who serves as their Mommy or Daddy.” There’s one out there for us all, eh? [Website]

Crazy Blind Date


This site is for intrepid souls only! In a nutshell, you are not allowed to see any photos of your potential dates beforehand and the service will match you up according to where you live. At the time of this review, the website only boasted eight major U.S. cities, but there is an option to select your own location to see if they have a listing. There are three options to choose from: a solo date, a double date, or you don’t care. The novelty steps in when you next have the option of going out on a date that very same night! Next, you select the area in your chosen city you wish to go to, then sit back and wait for an e-mail confirmation that the date is scheduled. Not for the faint of heart! [Website]

420 Dating


For those of you who have been living on the moon as of late, the term “420 friendly” is slang for “I smoke weed.” Finally, the stoners have an online community where you can find someone you can share the munchies with. Strangely enough, the site’s Terms of Service page states: “The following is a partial list of the kind of Content that is illegal or prohibited on the Website. It includes Content that promotes information that you know is false, misleading or promotes illegal activities. It also states at the bottom of the landing page: ” 420dating.com does not advocate the use of any illegal substances.” And yet on the front page are photos of the latest “Featured Smokers” enjoying a nice healthy dose of hydroponics. Uhhhh, what? [Website]

Darwin Dating


Yes, online dating has been reduced to the shallowest end of the mudpuddle with this matchmaking service. The criteria to join is STRICT as they allow “beautiful people only.” And that doesn’t include inner beauty. They even include what they affectionately call the “Chimp Calculator” to test your unattractiveness level! Their tagline? “Online dating minus ugly people.” One can only imagine how much Photoshopping has been done to these profiles! [Website]

Trek Passions


What couple argues about finances anymore? Here you can find that special someone who can debate whether Jean-Luc or James T. was the better captain, and then go snuggle under your Ewok/Death Star matching sheets. From the home page: “A 100% free online community and SciFi personals site for science fiction lovers, including but not limited to lovers of Star Trek and Star Wars.” Its tagline is: “Love long and Prosper!” Just remember to have your partner checked for Tribble infestation before becoming, *ahem*, intimate. [Website]

No Longer Lonely


Are you schizophrenic? Do you suffer from paranoia? Do you play with your own waste with great delight? Well, thankfully a site has been created to match up people with histories of mental illness. Costing nothing to join with full access to all of its features, No Longer Lonely boasts it’s the only dating site of its kind. Now what could possibly go wrong here? And as an alternative, here’s a site for people suffering with an STD. Now if only they would combine these two. [Website]

Tall Friends


If you happen to suffer from tinyophobia (the fear of little people), you might want to check this site out. It specifically caters to like-minded singles who are of a specific height, meaning TALL. Verbatim, their introduction is: “Welcome to the best, largest and most effective tall dating site in the world. This is the best place for looking for tall dating relationship or marriage. We bring together tall-dating minded singles from USA, UK, Canada, Australia, Europe and more. Here you could mingle with tall singles, tall beautiful women and tall handsome men.” [TallFriends Website]

As an alternative there is a dating site for short people that can be found here. [DateALittle Website]

Women Behind Bars


You have a better than average chance at hooking up here for obvious reasons. Unfortunately, the site doesn’t list what these women’s offenses were to land them in prison, so you’re taking your chances. Surprisingly, if you get a chance to read the “What People are Saying About Us” page, the percentage is high for satisfied customers. Price-wise, it costs you a mere 3 dollars to obtain one address where you can converse via snail mail. The site even has an “Add to Cart” and “Checkout” button after you’re done shopping for your badass beauties! A huge plus is you can pretty much rely on the fact that they’re not going to cheat on you with your best friend. Or anyone else for that matter. [Website]

Scientific Match


At a measly $2000 for a lifetime membership, this site boasts that it will find you a match based on PHYSICAL chemistry. Their CLIA/ASH-accredited lab analyzes your supplied DNA sample (immune system genes) to find that perfect someone, and then destroy it after they’re done with it. What are the benefits of DNA comparison?
  • Chances are increased that you’ll love the natural body fragrance of your matches.
  • You have a greater chance of a more satisfying sex life.
  • Women tend to enjoy a higher rate of orgasms with their partners.
  • Women have a much lower chance of cheating in their exclusive relationships.
  • Couples tend to have higher rates of fertility.
  • All other things being equal, couples have a greater chance of having healthier children with more robust immune systems.
[Website]

Ashley Madison Agency


This site, dedicated to married/single folks seeking out “arrangements” with other married folks, sadly has (to date) 4,255,000 members. This site recently took off in America and was like a rash over popular radio station commercial breaks and contains the tagline: “Life is short. Have an affair!” The site GUARANTEES an affair if you sign up, although they do mention in their disclaimer that they are not personally held liable for personal injury or death that should happen to you if you use their services. Which, unfortunately, will be an unexpected guarantee as well. [Website]

Scary Museums That Will Scare Your Socks Off

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Some of the most famous museums which can make you feel the part of that world. The setups of museums are fascinating, scary and sometimes horrifying. Let me tell you about some of the museums which can make you scare.

The Purgatory Museum


According to Catholic doctrine, a person who dies with only slight sins on their soul goes to purgatory to be cleansed by fire before floating off to heaven. At the Church of the Sacred Heart in the Prati district of Rome, there is a small museum tucked away behind a side altar. It is the Purgatory museum. This truly scary place has exhibits which document cases of souls in purgatory coming back to earth to haunt the living.

Some of the items on display are a table with scorch marks and lines carved out of it by an otherworldly hand, as well as burnt fingerprints on clothing and bedlinen. But perhaps the scariest item of all is a book with an entire human handprint scorched deeply into the pages – the handprint of a long dead monk suffering in the fires for some unknown sin.

Mutter Museum


The Mutter Museum is best known for its large collection of skulls and anatomical specimens including a wax model of a woman with a human horn growing out of her forehead, the tallest skeleton on display in North America, a 5 foot-long human colon that contained over 40 pounds of poop, and the petrified body of the mysterious Soap Lady whose entire corpse was turned into soap after she died. The museum also houses a malignant tumor removed from President Grover Cleveland’s hard palate, the conjoined liver from the famous Siamese twins Chang and Eng Bunker, and a growth removed from President Abraham Lincoln’s assassin, John Wilkes Booth. It may not terrify you – but I guarantee that it will end up haunting your dreams.

Museum of Anatomy


Honoré Fragonard was a professor of anatomy – at least he was until he got canned for showing the symptoms of insanity! Twenty years later he began the work that would be his life’s crowning achievement. In 1794 he began gathering dead bodies for what would become his museum of anatomy. His museum was designed to house a gigantic collection of corpses that he personally stripped of their skin and embalmed with a secret recipe – a recipe that remains a mystery to this day. The collection contains the preserved flayed bodies of animals, children, and executed criminals as well as a collection of skulls from asylums for the mentally disturbed. This museum in Paris is so horrifying that entry is available by appointment only.

Madame Tussauds


Madame Tussauds in London is best known for its enormous collection of wax figures – mostly of famous people. But the museum had a more grisly start. Madame Tussaud herself started the collection during the French revolution. She would run up to the guillotine after people had been executed and make wax imprints of their severed heads. The most famous is probably that of the last King of France. These heads are all on display at the museum along with a horrifying collection of monstrous historical displays in the chamber of horrors. When you see the life-sized reproduction of one of Jack the Ripper’s victims, you will never be quite the same again. Oh – and to make matters worse, the chamber of horrors now employs actors to jump out and terrify visitors. Take along a change of underwear.

Lombrosp’s Museum of Criminal Anthropology


Cesare Lombroso founded the Italian school of criminology. It is no wonder then that this museum – filled with objects from his work is a terrifying place indeed. Combined with the macabre collectibles are images of crimes, weapons used to slaughter humans, and even Lombroso’s own head perfectly preserved in a bottle of formaldehyde. If you are interested in crime – or just want to spend a day gazing at skulls, human remains, and other horrifying objects, this is the place to go.

London Dungeon


The London dungeon is really famous. So you may wonder why it isn’t in the top five of this list. Mainly because it is scary in a different way from the rest of the items here. It is scary in the sense that no one wants a random stranger dressed as the grim reaper to jump at them while screaming. That aside, the dungeon does present a great selection of macabre torture devices from the middle ages. Mind you, your local army base probably has an equally terrifying array of torture devices from the last decade! If you go to the Dungeon take your heart medication with you – those actors can certain put the frights up you. Oh – and be prepared to queue for a long time – it is a popular attraction. The only place you will have seen queues longer is at a bakery in Soviet Russia.

Catacombs of Palermo


Not intending to be a museum, that is exactly what the Catacombs of Palermo have become – a museum of death. Deep in the bowels of the Capuchin monastery you can view hundreds of corpses – both monks and local members of the community. The bodies are lined up along the walls in the clothes in which they were buried. Bodies were put in the catacombs from the end of the 16th century to the last interment – little Rosalia Lombardo in the 1920s. The cool air and dry environment mean that the bodies are extremely well preserved – so well preserved in fact that some look like they are just sleeping. But most look like hideous corpses ready to wake up at any moment to attack the visitors. A must see holiday spot.

New Haven Ventriloquist Museum


In New Haven connecticut there is a museum that contains nothing but row upon row of old ventriloquist’s dummies. Every seat in the theatre has a dummy in it – in fact, when you visit you have to stand on the stage because there is no room anywhere else. Now most people don’t suffer from Autonomatonophobia (the fear of artificial humanoid figures – yes it’s real) but even the staunchest of the staunch will be horrified by this awful display. Just think “Chuckie” times one thousand.

Glore Psychiatric Museum


Who wouldn’t want to check out a museum dedicated to the history of such wonderful things as electroshock treatment and lobotomies? Well – most people probably. But for those who have a taste for the downright shocking, the Glore Psychiatric museum is for you. And if you find the horrifying parts of the museum too much to cope with, you can relax in the “awful things people have swallowed” exhibition. Don’t forget to check out the ancient treatments area where you can see instruments for bleeding patients and the fascinating dioramas taking you step by step through a psychosurgical operation.

House on the Rock


Originally designed to house a collection of basically anything, the House on the Rock in Deer Shelter Rock, Wisconsin first opened in 1959. The house contains fascinating exhibits such as a re-creation of an early twentieth century American Town and a 200 foot model of a sea monster. Now this doesn’t sound too scary but only because I forgot to mention that the entire collection is basically left to rot in dark, dusty rooms. Now imagine such a room room filled with the stench of rot in which you can just make out a scattering of decayed mannequins sawing at old broken musical instruments – playing what sounds like a symphony written in hell! Having seen it, I can assure you that the real thing is far worse than the description!

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Weird College Courses

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In recent years,colleges have revamped their course structure to pave the way for some unusual courses to be incorporated into the curriculum. While some of them may have dregs of intellectual inquiry, others are downright bizarre.

The Phallus


The people at Occidental College decided that in the course of human events it becomes necessary for students to delve into the ‘signification of the phallus’ and the ‘relation of the phallus to masculinity, femininity, genital organs and the fetish’. It being self evident that the phallus occupies a central theme in the psychoanalytic theories of gender and sexuality, the course occupies a pivotal role in the Intercultural and Queer program.All this for a price of about four thousand five hundred dollars.

The Art of Walking


The Art of Walking might seem trivial to some, but not to Dr Ken Keffer, Professor of Modern Languages at Centre College, Kentucky. He conducts a class dedicated to the understanding of ‘intelligible and sensual design in inner and outer nature’,first expounded by Immanuel Kant. Apart from the customary walks which he takes with his students to the nearby Perryville Battlefield and the surrounding areas,Dr Keffer assigns freelance walking assignments for students to appreciate the subtleties of walking. Now, where is this college again?

Maple Syrup: The Real Thing


Those who decide to attend Alfred University in a bucolic part of Western New York State, may find themselves in a classroom studying the subtleties concerned with the production of maple syrup. The only prerequisite for the course is the ‘willingness to work for long periods in snow,cold and mud’. The production techniques invented by the Native Americans which have endured constant change are dissected, visits to local producers, restaurants and festivals augmenting the process. It’s the Real Thing, so students can find jobs easily with this course on their resume!

Zombies!
The living dead in Literature, Film and Culture


The American South is still the bastion of conservatism and evangelism, but that doesn’t stop them from trying to expound Zombies. The credit for this pioneering course must go to Sean Hoade, professor of English at the University of Alabama at Tuscaloosa, who draws parallels between American consumption patterns and Zombies. His observation that ‘zombies act as a mirror for Americans, not only as we see ourselves but also as the rest of the world sees America in the time of George W. Bush: as a roaming, voracious killer turning its victims into soulless creatures like itself’ may be a little far fetched, but his students are not complaining.

Philosophy and Star Trek


Philosophy students at Georgetown University read works by Aristotle, Kant and others. However, its done under the pretext of understanding the philosophical depths of Star Trek.

The course serves as an introduction to metaphysics and epistemology philosophy,and tries to dissect the major philosophical questions which come up in the science fiction entertainment drama. Another proof that the ingenuity of educators has conjured ways of teaching which were hitherto unknown.

The Art of Sin and the Sin of Art


The Rhode Island School of Design attracts aspiring artists and designers from around the country but it is inconceivable to think that some of them might want to ‘lust with the saints and burn with the sinners.’ However, if any one of them accepts the invitation, they can spend the semester analysing the moral dimensions of the works of classical as well as modern artists. Being the artsy school that RISD is, the course and the teacher should have a cult following.Well, different strokes for different folks.

The Joy of Garbage


No matter how useless Garbage sounds, Virginia Matzek of Santa Clara University will try to change your impression of it. A ‘science class for non science-majors’, the Joy of Garbage is apparently a ‘serious class where students are required to do research and learn how to work with data’. Among the questions asked are “What is the difference between ‘garbage’ ,’discard’ and ‘waste’?” and “What could be a better title for the course?” ‘The Joy of Wasting time’,perhaps?

Stupidity


Occidental college makes another appearance on the list, this time for the accommodation of stupidity. Of course, the word refers the name of the course rather than a quality possessed by its students. The course itself uses works of Friedrich Nietzsche and Gilles Deleuze among others to clarify that ‘stupidity is neither ignorance nor organicity, but rather, a corollary of knowing and an element of normalcy, the double of intelligence rather than its opposite’. Only those who indulge in it must know.

The Theology of Eating


Since such an important aspect of everyday living must have theological implications, Loyola college decided that the inextricable link between God and eating was to be explored. Students are taught the ‘complex religious aspects associated with eating’, exploring the texts to expound the intricacies of etiquette in a canonical context. The evolution debate may not have been decided, but common sense predicts problems for those who do not eat a balanced diet. However, if free servings are part of the deal,it may help all those poor souls dissect (food) theology.

The Unbearable Whiteness Of Barbie


A mandatory course for some freshmen at Occidental College, ‘The Unbearable Whiteness of Barbie-Race and Popular Culture in the United States” tries to explore ways in which “scientific racism has been put to use in the making of Barbie.” Elizabeth Chin, the instructor of this course warns students that the course itself is no child’s play. With assigned readings ranging from Sandra Kisneros to Karl Marx, the course incorporates some pretty hardcore academic content. Nevertheless, a course on race which describes the whiteness of Barbie as unbearable seems incredibly unscientific. Wonder if this course was offered when a certain gentlemen named Barack Obama was roaming the corridors of this West Coast institution.

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Medical Science's Best Bloopers and Outtakes

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While we can never fully come to terms with the throes and devastations we are dealt by the natural world, that doesn’t stop us from trying to mount a saddle on the very worst of it. Along the way to a closer understanding of virtual infinity, there have been stubborn and idealistic, if not necessary, shots in the dark with the hopes of an eventual hit, a glimpse of enlightenment.

Conversion Therapy


Championed by conservatives and conservative-minded people, conversion theory is anything but a joke, that is actually valid as a school of medical thought. Also known as the “gay cure,” this treatment is alleged to reverse the onset of homosexuality as if it were a kind of disability or acquired trait. A big gray area in psychological study, homosexuality has been probed for ages, by both Freud and his daughter Anna, and hasn’t come up with any valid conclusiveness that can be pinpointed under a microscope. Obviously controversial, the therapy has resulted in pulverized self-esteem/worth and the occasional chance of suicide. After all, what can be expected when a child is told something he can’t control is “not right” with him. What comes to mind is Nazi scientists measuring Jewishness against intelligence level: xenophobia is a terrible inspiration for scientific research.

Insulin Shock Therapy


One of several controversial forms of “shock therapy” which involve, essentially, shocking a patient’s system into making a desirable change. Oftentimes such procedures apply to schizophrenics and those with severe cases of mental illness. With this particular example a patient is administered gradually increased doses of insulin until they seize and sink into a several day coma. The thinking is that some kind of normalization will lie on the other side of the coma, when more likely it’s just death. Here we have another “Try Anything” treatment that feigns to be medical science, and not just a bunch of intrusive tinkering, the likes of which aren’t unlike kicking a TV to get it to work right.

Human/Animal Testing


While such is necessary as an ultimate step, going straight from hypothesis to dissection is wildly reckless, not to mention inhumane. This fact wasn’t learned without making some mistakes along the way: in testing the effectiveness the first polio vaccine, human subjects were used with little to no discrepancy. Few were able to live to tell about it. Now precautions are observed with great fastidiousness and humans are only called in when certainty is closely realized. The fact remains that animals are often used as a human substitute, which is no less cruel if you believe in animal rights. There are alternatives to animal testing, championed by most activist groups, such as plants and bacteria, lifeforms that don’t feel pain, where the only sacrifice is timeliness.

Cocaine


The ultimate painkiller, cocaine used to be prescribed for a variety of mundane ailments, ranging from depression to headaches, and was naturally the best sought way to make all bad feelings turn to good ones. That was before it became illegal, or any kind of official evaluation or prolonged study turned out any possible negative effect of treating the stuff like aspirin, such as the addictive qualities, possibilities of overdose, and psychological/cardiological detriments. Freud himself had more than a bad habit, which explained all his vivid dreams, and saw no reason his patients couldn’t benefit themselves from his favorite nose candy. While it may have lost its favor in medical science, it maintained its popularity in nightclubs straight into the eighties.

Barber-Surgeons


You may notice whenever you go to get a haircut by some lost-in-time WWII vet who really loves baseball, something that looks like a slice of a giant candy cane marking the door. What you may not realize is the origin of such a universal staple which goes back to when haircuts and major surgery shared a common denominator: the barber-surgeon. The red and white striping hails directly from the bloody bandages which said hack-artist would drape around a pole. Thankfully barbers these days only operate with a pair of hair clippers and the occasional lollipop.

Blood-Letting


Blood-letting stems back to an ancient Greek tradition, where in which blood would be drained from an afflicted individual in order to balance the bodily “humors” which were thought to be the determining factors of one’s health. This practice was kept up in medieval Europe as barber-surgeons would drain blood to rid toxins.

Radiated Water


Before radium was seen as a radioactive health hazard, even while it’s used as a form of cancer treatment, it was inserted into water and marketed as a possible fountain of youth. (There was also a time when smoking was thought good for you.) It was suggested that it provided an undefinable “spark of life” when consumed, a death-defying miracle treatment of sorts. It was even put into toothpaste and other household goods. We still sell extremely dangerous substances(i.e. any not-yet-recalled prescription drug) under the pretense that it’ll make life so much better, that is assuming it doesn’t kill you.

Leeches


Even while leeches are still used to this day, it’s not often you go to the doctor complaining of a sore throat and he pulls out a juicy leech as a remedy. Barber-surgeons relied on this natural blood-letter to fix virtually every medieval ailment, thinking it could drain all impurities in a really good suck session. While it sounds barbaric, leeches do have true medical merit; they are used in some kinds of reconstructive surgery to prevent clotting, as the leeches produce a special anti-coagulant enzyme (called hirudin) in their saliva for that very purpose.

“Rest Cure”


Pioneered by Dr. Silas Weir Mitchell in the latter half of the 19th century, this controversial treatment was prescribed mostly to women who were seen as “hysterical.” The treatment called for a virtual surrendering of autonomy of women seen as some generic form of “not well.” Resting, in these terms, meant no reading, movement, talking, or imagination of any sort. As such, women striving for empowerment were rightfully taken aback by such medical suggestion (e.g. Charlotte Perkins Gilman’s short story “The Yellow Wallpaper” which emphasizes the mad tyranny in perpetually being told to stay in bed by a better-knowing man).

Peg Legs


Peg legs were the prosthetic limb of choice for pirates and Civil War-era amputees who wanted to get their hobble on. A crude hunk of wood fastened to the remaining leg-matter, a peg leg was an option for upright mobility that today is a lot better than was the case a few hundred years ago: nowadays artificial legs and prosthetics allow the legless to run in Olympic-caliber strides, and move about without looking distinctly “parrot less.”